Are you a Hand Holder? Probably not. The Chinese are, and they own us.

I had an interesting time recently, at a job for 15,000 Chinese Amway salesmen, that took me by surprise. I was shocked at how warm and fuzzy the Chinese were. Sure, they were shrewd business folk, but to see through that to the person, they were fascinating. It took my mind back to my visit to Hong Kong years ago and how lovely I thought the people were there, very warm and friendly, so very high in contrast to my cold austere visit to Japan. Some how at that time, I gave the former British Imperialism the credit for the friendliness and would never expect any of that from a (gasp) communist country.

Weren't they all miserable? Just a piece of the puzzle? All wearing the same clothes? Well, yes in fact they were wearing the same clothes, an Amway company jacket, and quite proudly, I might add. But they were all so enthusiastic and friendly, and looked so...happy. Not the large mega-red ga-zillion strong people I thought, former best friends with old USSR. I realized what a child of the cold war I was, how I truly believed I would die in a nuclear war and not live to see 25.

There was a moment in the show when the audience needed to be corralled away from a moving set piece. The volunteer Chinese stage crew that were working the room automatically, without rehearsing, linked hands and formed a human chain as a barrier. This chain was respected by those on either side of it, and wasn't challenged by anyone. After the set piece moved and the human chain was not really needed anymore, I watched as at least 75% of them maintained their handhold with one another. There was no fidgeting, embarrassment or discomfort. ADULTS holding hands with each other. Co-workers or strangers, you'd NEVER see Americans behaving so... unassuming and unafraid of each other, not without getting paid a lot, like actors- maybe. So comfortable in their own skin.

At what age did we learn to keep our distance? Is it cultural? Are we that jaded? Is it cooties?

It is hard to know if this is just the 2010's and our behavior now, much more guarded, that maybe we lost it since the '70's. I discussed this with Sarah and we tried to think of a time we'd seen Americans holding hands in public. The closest thing we could come up with was the singing and swaying hippies on a hill during the "Coke and a Smile" "teach the world to sing" add campaign of the early 70's. So simple. Happy. Of course that song made everyone want to hold hands, and even hug, but you have to hold your Coke in one hand, so it probably wasn't that easy to make a human chain. Ok. Now maybe the commercial is fuzzier now. Yeah, actors, paid to hold hands. Ok. Never mind.....

I want to hold Arlo's hand forever. I mean, I hope he wants to hold my hand forever, without fear, for him to be comfortable in his own skin. He already has a mighty grip.

Arlo reaching out boldly for Olive's hand, without fear.

So, I HAD to see if it was posted, and yes, here it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mOEU87SBTU&feature=related

I haven't seen it in 30 plus years. Amazing. Watch it. NO ONE is holding hands. Just Cokes. Ahh, America. Just the fuzzy memory of a handhold without really touching each other.